Wednesday, January 5, 2011

New Year, New Commitments


Sea World with my sister and our exchange student Sunny

It just seems appropriate to start the new year reflecting on the past and looking forward to what is to come. In the process, it's gotten me to thinking about the past more. I wonder if we knew the consequences of our decisions if it would make us change our mind before. I am pretty sure there's a few decisions I'd like to change or relationships I would not mind restoring a bit. But sometimes I think that there are things that are broken that cannot be mended enough to completely fix them. It's been quite the year I would say. I've had a lot of fun, but I think there's a lot that I want to be careful of for the next year.

At my small home church on Sunday, we talked about New Years Resolutions. Seems like that is a popular topic around this time of year. The pastor said how he didn't think that resolution was the right word, but rather a commitment. I guess that seems to sound better to me too. Although I think some are goals rather than commitments, I think they can almost go hand in hand. The pastor asked if anyone wanted to share their new years "commitment" and everyone that did said something about wanting to be closer to God or growing their relationship...I guess to me it seemed like a cliche answer in church. I didn't want to answer at all because my "commitments" seemed tacky after that. But then I started thinking about it and I want to be closer to God to and grow my relationship...but more than that, I want the things I do to be a reflection of my love for God. I don't think that's been the case for awhile. I know I can be hard on myself, but I do believe that I haven't given God my everything and I want to make that my commitment for this year and the years to come. Maybe the other commitments will come easier after that. I want to figure out my plans after I graduate in December (seems so far away but I know it'll come fast). I want to graduate with a 3.9 GPA...not sure if it's possible anymore, but I will get as close to that as I can. I would like to be a great Maid 0f Honor to my sister. (So glad I was with her to find her dress!) I'd like to not be such a nervous person. I don't like being the passenger in cars especially...and at this rate I'm pretty sure I'm on the road to having a panic attack from not being a confident passenger. And I'm sure there are many more things I would like to improve on or do, but they'll come as the year goes on. I'll start off now believing that God has me in the right place and really trying to trust Him first.

Back to school tomorrow. Can't believe my time at home is already over with. Won't see this place again until probably July for the wedding. Seems crazy. But, on a good note, I might have found an internship for the summer, so I'm pretty excited and praying it works out.

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